It’s Talk Like A Pirate Day! Blimey but if I don’t know ‘ow to talk like a pirate really. I let out a few hearty YAAAHHHHRRRs for the neighbors’ benefits around noon today then promptly went back to my cushion-cover sewing project.
Let’s try again:

ARRRRRRRR!!! Defend yer BOOTY, ye NERFHERDER!!!
er, wait…

(Hmm, lunchtime) LETS SEE WHAT CRAWLED OUTTA THE BUNGHOLE! YYYAAAAAAAAARRRRHHHHGGGHHH (cough cough).

Arr, pass me the grog, SMARTLY like, YE LUBBER!